Reflections

A few things have happened over the past few weeks that have given me pause for reflection.  When we are born, many say we are on a pre-determined path in our lives.  We have our fate, our destiny, our course all mapped out and ready to go.  Perhaps, we do live on a certain tangent within the Universe.  Maybe that is simply not true.

In any event, I was recently questioning my role in the Universe.  More particularly, I was also wondering if deep down I am a good enough person and even though I make mistakes, I wondered if perhaps I am not always the "good" person I seek to be.  

I try to be the best possible version of me.  Not just for my own "selfish" reasons, but so that I can pave the way for my children to follow their own paths.  Not only do I wish for them to grow up to "function in the real world", but I want them to be good people.  I desire my children to be the kind of giving people in the world, the ONE that may just make a difference in someone's life.  I want to demonstrate a multitude of times over the ripple effect of a good deed carried out, the impact of a pay it forward, or how wonderful a "kill 'em with kindness" act brings out the best in them.

Recently, an adult had me question whether I was a good person or not.  Rationally, I should never have doubted myself in this particular instance.  However, because I was sort of already under the weight of my own emotional elephant, okay - I was a little down in the dumps - I allowed my irrational thoughts to entertain my core person within.  

I was torn.  I was sad.  I have done so many good deeds for this person and his/her family, that I wondered why they would challenge me so.  Now, do not get me wrong - I do not expect any amount of good deeds done to erase any accountability for a wrong action; however, I know in this instance that there is much more to the story and I stand firm in my position.  Yet, I allowed this incident to get the better of me for a few days.

I have come to realize the POWER OF ONE.  Yes, I put that in caps for a reason.  Emphasis added.  POWER OF ONE.  I allowed one person to completely derail my well-being for a few days.  No matter how many times I reaffirmed my side of the story to myself and reassured myself that I had not wronged anyone; I still felt sad and questioned my virtues.

Reality then set in.  Yes!  POWER OF ONE.  You have heard it from me before, and now you will hear it from me again.  Instead of dwelling on this negative situation in my life, I have given myself a nice swift kick in the rear.  I will turn my frown upside down.  

POWER OF ONE.  I will focus on the positive.  I know in my heart that I am a good person.  I know that I feel good about paying it forward.  I try to find many creative and many straight-forward ways to pull off good deeds.  

POWER OF ONE.  What's that famous quote about casting a stone and watching all the ripples you create?  Yes.  

I started looking outwardly from me, with reflections.  In this past week alone, I have seen examples of local friends paying it forward and it so warms my heart.  One friend was the recipient of a cake from another.  One friend has a group effort going to continually remind and offer new opportunities for others to pay it forward.  One friend's father was severely injured and the offers to provide help keep pouring in day after day.  Another friend received a coupon for a coffee from another.  One friend started a new fundraiser to keep her deceased brother's legacy alive by providing sports scholarships for young kids.  Another friend kicked off a scholarship to keep her son's memory alive with the support of the community.  Our own Curvy Girl, Mandy, started a group to engage each others' children this summer in all sorts of memory making to be had.

So, after my rainy day party on myself, I came home yesterday to collect the mail.  I received an envelope with a very beautiful, but youthful/juvenile cursive writing addressed to me with no return address.  I opened the envelope to find a very endearing card with a 8.5 x 11 typed letter thanking me.  Yes, a letter of thanks for being me.  The card was signed:  <3 A Friend.  My heart melted, a smile took over my face and my cloud lifted.  Someone did an act of kindness and paid it forward to me!

POWER OF ONE.  

All I can say is please do not ever question your ability to make a difference in the life of someone.  What you view as a small act, may in reality be the one thing that changes someone else's day or their outlook, or quite possibly even their life.